SPENCER SPANKING PLAN
( CLICK HERE for MEMBERS version )
CLICK HERE for the full version of the plan ( however , it would be best to read this page first ) .
Some time in the late '20s or early
'30s , Dr. Dorothy Spencer conceived the idea of settling domestic misunderstandings in her
home based on giving and receiving " carefully regulated " corporal
punishment .
Her idea was to establish a system of " cooperative discipline " that would sincerely benefit the party at fault and
prevent all serious trouble by furnishing a " definite , fair and effective method of
adjustment . "
She reported , in 1936 , that the plan was a " wonderful success . " More than 60
years later , I think it still offers some sound ideas that couples can use to enhance their
relationship , and that can be very useful in the
context of a relationship between a woman ( or man ) and a disciplinarian , with whom
(s)he
is not romantically involved , as well . I expand upon some of the elements of this plan,
both in my own words and in Mrs. Spencer's , below .
THE FUNDAMENTALS
The key to the use of spanking in this context is to administer punishment in a timely
manner and then move forward with a clean slate . This heads off the possibility that one or the other person will be
withholding , or let anger sit and gnaw at him or her, which is likely to lead to
potentially ugly fights and ongoing tension . As Mrs. Spencer says , " The couple that
has every difference out when it arises is not likely to build up an antagonism that can
be settled only in the divorce courts . "
In order for this plan to work , the two people have to agree on a list of
causes . As we'll
see later , this list goes into something resembling a contractual agreement . You can get specific about relative severities if
you'd like , or you can leave that up to the discretion of the person administering the
discipline , but the important thing is to
negotiate what constitutes a punishable offence . This term can cover a wide variety of
things , but I find the following guidelines useful :
A cause should involve some behaviour that the spankee is genuinely interested in
moderating or changing ( for example smoking ) . The list shouldn't have more than a few
items . If you object to lots of different things that your partner does , domestic
discipline won't go very far in addressing the root of the problem .
Punishment spankings are meant to
be fairly serious . As such , you'll want to define your causes in such a way that
discipline sessions occur with a frequency that will be effective without being
overwhelming . This doesn't mean that you need to establish specific times for
discipline ,
although that can be very effective ( For example : Friday night , after work but before the weekend has started )
. It means that you need
to find a good balance so that the spankee has time to absorb the lessons from one
spanking before finding her(him)self in the midst of another one .
For instance , say that your partner has a problem with being rude in public . You could
focus your list of causes on the ways this rudeness manifests itself . Being insulting to a
stranger ( say , a waiter in a restaurant ) , to a friend , and to you in front of others
would all justify punishment spankings , to be administered as soon as the two of you were
alone. ( Telling your partner what (s)he can expect may help mitigate the situation in the
short term , as (s)he contemplates what's going to happen . Whether you share that with
others is up to you ! )
Once the list is in place , you need to live up to the agreement on a consistent
basis . In
other words , if your partner commits an offence , (s)he's going to be punished
, no matter what . She(he)'ll lose respect for the arrangement--and , chances
are , for you--if you don't follow through each and every time .
The goal is to establish a negative effect for each cause on your list , and that effect
simply must result for the plan to be effective . Along those lines , it's important that
the spankee not argue ; rather , (s)he should accept the fact that (s)he deserves
discipline , and act accordingly .
RULES AND REGULATIONS
( These are from Mrs. Spencer. )
Care must be taken not to bruise the flesh , raise welts or injure the body in any
way . The
punishment should continue long enough , however , to be truly effective and to impart a beneficial
lesson . A spanking must
never be administered in anger. Wait until both parties are calm and it can be carried out
properly . The spanking over , the incident must close . To hold anything against
a punished
partner ,
after a spanking has been given , is in direct violation of this whole method of correction .
Request punishment must be given . It is not enough to take the discipline without fuss or
argument when our punishing partner feels we should have it -- we must also ask for it , when we know or feel that we
deserve it .
The punishment should be inflicted on the bare skin . To do the job properly , a constant observation of the skin must be maintained .
Spencer doctrines call for the prompt acceptance of the discipline . There must be no
argument -- no protest -- no pleading to be let off -- no hard feelings about it .
Note that Mrs. Spencer also insists that a woman should only be spanked by hand
. I
disagree with this notion , especially if you and your partner also engage in more
obviously erotic spanking
activities . I suggest that
you designate one instrument , such as a traditional hairbrush or small paddle , for use only in the context
of punishment
spankings . ( Of course , there's no reason not to use more severe implements as
appropriate . Please , though , keep in mind that you need to be careful not to cause any
real harm . ) The original implements , to be used on the man , were a strap and a wooden
paddle .
METHOD
A punishment spanking should result in the spankee reaching a point at which (s)he's
genuinely sorry for their behaviour . This doesn't translate well into a certain amount of
smacks , or a certain length , for a given offence , but the following tips might be of use :
Ritual is important with regard to domestic discipline . Whether you arrange for the
spankee to bare their bottom before going over your lap , or you take all of their clothes off while
(s)he's standing in front
of you , or (s)he goes across fully dressed and you prepare him( her ) yourself
, or some other variation , you should follow the same routine each time .
Reinforcement is more effective if every detail is in
place . ( Even if you decide to escalate to a more
severe punishment with an instrument like a strap or cane , which is more effective when the spankee is in a position other than
over your knee , bent over a chair , for example -- I highly recommend that you conduct the main
portion of the spanking
in the traditional position . The added intimacy is a healthy element of the
process . ) There are two basic rhythms that one can use in a discipline spanking : consistent and
escalating . A spanker can also choose to mix things up , spanking different areas of the
bottom , or adopt a left - right - left - right pattern . Any combination , performed with
proper
technique , is likely to work in a given situation . It's important to know ,
though , that if a spanking starts off too hard and/or fast , it can immediately put
the spankee in a bad place
physically -- and emotionally -- and the pain will be too distracting for her (
him ) to be able to focus on why (s)he's being
punished and how (s)he can avoid it in the future . I recommend talking with your
spankee as you're disciplining her(him) as well ; speaking calmly but authoritatively , between sets of smacks ,
will help them grasp the lesson you're trying to impart just that much
more quickly. ( On the other hand ,
there's also something to be said for taking your partner over your knee , baring the
bottom , and giving them a relatively brief but effective spanking and then sending them on their way without saying a
word , as long as the message is still clear . )
The subject of tears is problematic , to say the least . I think that many women ( and some
men , but not many ) who are interested in being spanked want to cry from a
spanking , and
that most of this desire is attached to a combination of the physical and the emotional (
along the lines I mentioned earlier ) . All I'll say on this matter is that it's likely to
be involve trial and error : the two of you need to find out what's going to work best for
you , and it may not fall into place right away . Maybe the spankee feels the need to shed
real tears before (s)he feels well and truly punished , or (s)he needs to reach a certain
intensity of crying in order to get to that frame of mind -- or maybe the idea of crying
during a spanking is just not acceptable to them .
Whatever the case is, you should err on the side of caution , it's better to continue to refine your approach than to punish your partner to the extent that (s)he resents you.
Regardless of how you proceed with domestic discipline, you simply must remember that
afterwards, it's time for a fresh start , and that means " kissing and making up
" within a reasonable period . This could be right away , with your partner sitting in
your lap while you comfort them ; it could be after , say , a certain amount of corner
time . Again , you should adopt whatever you think will work for you , and stick with
it . No matter what , though , once punishment has taken place , you should again treat your partner as your
equal , regardless of the nature of the relationship , with all of the attending emotions
that implies .
EXTRACTS FROM THE AGREEMENT
As I mentioned earlier , Dorothy Spencer recommended that a couple sign a formal mutual
agreement under which domestic discipline would take place . Here are some excerpts from the "
contract " she proposed , with the word " partner " substituted for
" husband " or " wife " as appropriate in this context .
" I , _______, partner of _______, do hereby acknowledge that I have read the Spencer
Spanking Plan and approve of the doctrines it advocates . From this date on it is my wish to have my conduct regulated by
the enforcement of these doctrines . I give to my partner , therefore , the full right and permission to spank me whenever
(s)he
feels such discipline would be helpful and be in accordance with the Spencer
Plan .
" This Agreement has been entered into willingly -- and for no other purpose than to
improve my disposition and secure the general benefit that always comes from the enforcement of intelligent
discipline . I
understand that I will be spanked without fail if I break my promise to refrain
from :
[list of causes follows]
I promise to cooperate with my partner faithfully . I will get ready for the
punishment promptly when asked to do so and I will bear him/her absolutely no ill will for
so disciplining me .
I promise further to ask for spankings when I feel I need them. I realise that
Request Punishment plays a highly important part in the Spencer Plan, and I will report and ask for the discipline when I feel I need or
deserve it .
[signed]
I , _______, partner of _______, in accordance with her wishes , as expressed
above ,
do hereby promise and agree to spank my partner whenever I feel such discipline would prove helpful to
her(him) .
For my partner's own good , I promise to discipline her(him) without fail whenever any of
the causes listed above have been violated
[signed] "
There is also a separate form of agreement , designed for a person living away for home , and a suitable " Disciplinarian " .
CLICK HERE for a full version of the plan .
We have decided to assist couples who wish to draw up a Spencer or Spankoz style plan . This assistance will take the form of preparing individual plans ( based on drafts provided ) and advice on their implementation , together with ongoing advice for the following three months . Further , but limited , assistance in mediating disputes arising from the plan will be available .
Opportunities to meet " Plan " couples are being provided through our Millennium High School as class 6E . Financial details are on the School Enrolment page .
( From : SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA SPANKED WIVES . )
( A discussion group , somewhat in decline . " The moderator believes that if there were more partners willing to take the time and effort to warm their spouses posteriors when warranted , perhaps there might be less divorces and more nuclear families intact " . )
Specific Things the Husband Can Do to Maintain Authority
( This is not for the eyes of dominant females ! )
( Welcome to our page. We practice and live Domestic Discipline, commonly called DD. We believe that the husband is the boss of the house. There are rules that must be obeyed.
We began this lifestyle as a mean in which to save our marriage. We had tried to have an equal relationship, but found it difficult. We would end up arguing about who was right and who was wrong, who wins and who loses, rather than the issues themselves.
I tried to be the boss of the house, but found that to be exhausting. After coming home from work, the last thing I wanted was to make a ton of decisions. I just wanted to relax. Since my husband was a born leader, he fit right into the role. There are times when I don't especially like to answer to him all the time, but this was the best solution for us. It has brought about peace in our home, and our relationship grew closer than ever.
The purpose of this page is to share with like-minded individuals. )
The first time I spanked someone, it was not out of erotic play or intent. My then-wife and I were having a terrible argument. Our marriage was almost over -- actually it had been for a while. The passion was gone, she wanted me to move out. For a couple of years, sex had been perfunctory at best.
We were in the bedroom. She was being absolutely unreasonable and would not listen to me. Out of sheer frustration, I grabbed her, threw her over my knee and administered a thorough bare-handed disciplining ... after which she jumped up, attacked me and tore off my clothes. We had the hottest, most passionate sex we had had in years.
.............. CARSON FITZGERALD
In certain areas of China , the husband is held responsible for excess pregnancies . If caught he receives a stroke of a light bamboo cane across his bare buttocks for each day that the pregnancy has advanced , up to 280 strokes for a full term . This technique has had marked results in limiting the Chinese over population problem !
Do you want to spank or be spanked ?
Marital Relations With a Young Bride ( MEMBERS )
DRAFT SPANKING CONTRACT
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SPANKOZ PLAN FOR SPANKING PARTNERS
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This page was last updated : Saturday, 06 June 2009
